Little Compromises 1/3

Having been married for the past 25 years, and being a mum to two daughters, I've learnt a little about the importance of compromise. The daily compromises we make like having a Chinese takeaway instead of the Indian you fancy and watching James Bond, Dora the explorer or a rom-com for the 20th time just to spend time cuddling on the sofa with your loved ones, all build strong bonds. Knowing someone loves you enough to lay down their desires so yours can be fulfilled is precious. Of course there are the not so fun filled compromises too! The debates and on going negotiations of what time is bedtime or maybe how many hours your partner is spending at work/the gym/ the pub. In healthy relationships, both parties share their point of view so the other can take it into consideration, weigh it up and see if they're willing to meet somewhere in the middle. We see Moses had ths kind of relationship with God. In Exodus 4:10-18 God chose Moses to speak to Pharaoh, Moses wanted Him to choose someone else so God still sent Moses but his brother became the spokesman. Throughout the time in the wilderness, God and Moses seemed to have ongoing negotiation talks about the punishment of the complaining Israelites! We see Abraham having a similar conversation in Genesis 8:16-33. 

There is another type of compromise that we can find ourselves in. The "abort mission! You have been compromised!" kind. Years ago, when the girls were small we went on a group day trip to Chester Zoo. Once there, we decided to go on the little monorail over the enclosures and headed to get tickets. At the machine, under 3's could go free, 3 - 10 yr olds were £1.50 each and adults £2 each.  The general concession was that there was no point buying tickets for the children who looked small enough to pass as under 3's. Our youngest was a very petite 3 year old and whilst I wanted to buy a ticket for her I was aware that this would cause a friction within the party. I'd look like I was trying to be "holier than thou"and I didn't want others to feel uncomfortable or judged, so despite it not feeling right, I decided that this was a compromise I would make to strengthen relationships. As I went to put the money in for my other tickets I heard the quiet but stern, internal voice of the Lord "Is your soul only worth £1.50 to you? Do you know how much it cost us to redeem you? Do you think because its only £1.50 it's less offensive than multimillion pound fraud? If anything it's worse!" As I thought about what Jesus had endured on the cross I was filled by a repugnant feeling. My salvation was free but not cheap, and that's what I'd made it. That was such a big wake up call for me. While I'd convinced myself that my motives justified my choice the truth was I hadn't made the decision with God in mind. It was a decision based on conformity and fear of man's judgment.

Living to please God can be awkward and uncomfortable. Others will mock and jeer our "keeping the rules" and it looks childish and a little bit lame from an outside perspective! It's been a while since someone last sneered at me for quiet obedience to God, but that should concern me. The kingdom of God hasn't been established around me so does that mean I've conformed to fit in? Probably. 

While I've never repeated that particular sin since, or heard God speak to me in such a sobering way, I've uncovered many other "little foxes" over the last few months where I've compromised holiness and integrity. We all have blind spots. The areas in our lives where what we say and do don't quite match up. That was why the people of Israel needed the prophets. Their role was to point back to the way, giving them the opportunity to see they'd taken a wrong turn and were heading to a place of destruction.
In Psalm 139 David asks God to search him, test him and see if there is anything in him that's offensive. This prayer isn't for God to "discover" something that was previously hidden to Him. After all, David has already said that God knows when he will sit and when he will lie down; the words that will come from his lips even before they're formed. This was an invite for God to reveal the junk that David had hidden from himself. What a brave prayer!

God is calling His Bride back to Holiness. In our desire to move away from being seen as a judgmental establishment of previous era's, as often happens, we've jumped straight over to the other extreme and are living pretty much as the world does. Jesus never compromised holiness but He loved people, spent time with them, showed compassion and mercy, and they flocked to listen. With His disciples there was an extra layer to this love. He taught, guided, rebuked. He had awkward conversations to bring correction to their thinking. He wasn't afraid that the truth would hurt or frighten them away. He trusted that the love He showed and the relationship they were building was strong enough. Fear of offence has crippled us from engaging in healthy discipline and constructive criticism. As we yield to the culturally excepted "everyone is special" without the honest challenge from trusted close friends, loved ones and leaders, we inadvertently put on the brakes for our growth to maturity.

This isn't about having a puritan list of rules that should be kept. Jesus fulfilled the Law for us so that we can live a new way. Our spirit connected to His Spirit. All I had to do in Chester zoo was turn my heart to God, share my dilemma and ask what His best was. Instead I chose compromise, choosing to bow to my fear and earthly wisdom rather than hear His wisdom and provision for that moment.  

We all have different potholes to watch out for and we all have different callings as do our children and these callings need unique equipping. Christianity isn't a "one size fits all" religion but a journey of faith filled with a hundred daily opportunities to say "Yes" to the Holy Spirit. A continuous yielding of our hearts as we are transformed into the likeness of Jesus, each yes expanding the Kingdom. 

Today, will you follow in the courageous footsteps of David? Will you ask the Holy Spirit to shine light on any areas of compromise that are out of sync with God's will for you? And through the process I pray that you will find freedom from any conformity and fear of man that is holding you captive. 

Hebrew 12:1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us

Psalm 139:22-24 Search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.

See if there is any offensive way in me,
and lead me in the way everlasting.